Marriage is like chemistry that requires gentle and wise hands.

Marriage is like chemistry that requires gentle and wise hands.

So, think long and hard before you say, I do!

The word is easier said than to achieve. The foundational secret to longevity and successful marriage is love, endurance, respect, understanding, communication and more importantly friendship.

Loving someone and being in love with someone are two different phenomena in marriage. Being in love and friendship sustains a marriage from everlasting to everlasting. Just like the love of Jesus Christ!

Marriage these days is conditional, particularly in a situation where you marry a wife or husband that is not a friend. When something is conditional it is very much depending on a lot of factors working together or otherwise.

Some people enter into marriage in order to take clever advantage of the other person, an opportunity they will not want to miss as such they go to any length to achieve their aim conditionally;
Some people get married out of insecurity constantly looking for acceptance; perhaps they have had a rough childhood experience of psychological and emotional neglect;
Some people get married as a result of disappointments in previous relationships;
Some people get married because it is the trend in their social cycle;
Some people get married for sexual gratification;
Some people get married based on physical appearance;
Some people get married as a result of connection, and or family tradition;
Some people get married based on intellectual capability and, or otherwise;
Some people get married just by accident of circumstances;
Some people get married because they need protection, power, and money;
Some people get married as a result of compatibility and long standing tested friendship;

Any marriage without mutual friendship and respect would eventually die. It will simply wither away like a tree denied of nutrition. When a marriage is starved of oxygen - oxygen of friendship - it dies and in time produces nasty smell.

Take your time before you consider marriage, build friendship above anything else that will hopefully prove to sustain you particularly during hard times. Marriage no matter how successful, has its ups and downs. The combined efforts of the elements within it produce longevity and tolerance.

It takes time and determination to build a city. The builders, in this case the couple, will without a doubt face the unpredictability of different kinds of weather. When the unpredictable starts to manifest in a marriage, the Yoruba concept, surulere (patience pays) should swing into action on both sites. Surulere (without necessarily finding reasons for excuses) should be the major component that glues them together come what may, till death do them part.

As they lovingly endure together embracing Surulere concept, God will eventually respond to their needs: He would put out the fire that may be raging in their city, he will calm the storm tossing them left, right and centre. The Lord will pilot them together in holy matrimony and friendship along the 'street' of Surulere into the paradise called Olorun s'ogo, God's grace.

Both couples will become an exemplary icon as they convey a message of hope to potential, new and existing couples that they have to go through 'Surulere street' to arrive successfully in the 'Olorun S'ogo' paradise.

It takes two committed friends in a relationship to start the journey of Discovery along the 'street of Surulere' heading to Olorun s'ogo.

Remember we come into this life with nothing and when we eventually exit, we will exit with practically nothing.

Have a reflective Afternoon/evening!!

Israel Ayodele E. A. Lazarus Oshunremi

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